Hoo-Ah
My foray into bringing the TABOO into the open! I'm certainly going to miss some, so please, feel free to add your own, and while you're at it, get friends and enemies to add their own and join the cult-status-following of the Musings of BradK....
1) Urinal Talkers
Sorry.. I'm standing there hanging onto my personal memorabilia, I don't really want to have a conversation. One of two things can happen... first, it will trigger a stupid sense memory later in life when my memorabilia should be doing something completely different, but no, my sense memory goes back to the Urinal Chat about how cold it is outside... and "cold" does not help the show if-you-know-what-I-mean. The other thing that can happen is that the conversation a la urinal can skew off to locker-room chats, and before you know it, I'm peeing all over the ceiling. There's a visual for all y'all. Speaking of locker room chats... do you suppose women locker rooms are full of girls bragging about their conquests and whatnot (as is the stereotypical male locker room... except for mine because I was always shoved in the locker by the jock-bully's and couldn't really hear the conversations or brag about finally figuring out that the Uvula wasn't what I thought it was).
2) The Guy/Girl that Won't Go Away
You know who I mean. You're at the bar, at a restaurant, standing in line for a movie, in bed, and there's that PERSON who just won't go away. You've given them clues like saying "Go Away" or clubbing them in the head with a large rock, or farting a lot - almost to the point of passing out (not from the smell, but from pushing so hard because you haven't had beans in a while... then the smell).
3) The Perversion of Traditional Religious Ideologies by Those With Personal Human Agendas Beyond the Purpose of the Teachings of the Religion.
Yeah. I hate that.
4) Sales as Kohl's.
Really...? REALLY..? Why call it a sale when it's ALWAYS that price?
5) "New Customer Promotions" from Time Warner Cable.
Sure, let's give the guy who's been giving all his money to DirecTV or Dish Network for years a break on his new cable bill. Not the guy who's loyally been raped monthly on their TIME WARNER CABLE SERVICE. That guy (cough cough, ME) is the sucker who will just put up with it. STOOPID...
6) 2-Year Cell Phone Contracts
You want to hear good stories about this... Talk to Jenny. 2 YEARS??? I don't even know what I'm going to do in 2 days, and I have to commit to a cell phone service for 2 YEARS!?? Other than World Dominance, I don't plan ahead.
7) Microsoft
And Apple. They both are very good at pointing out the other's bad points, and ignoring their own. Why is this taboo??? Well, wait until the loyalists read this and start defending their corporate baby.... Steve??? STEVE????
8) Anonymous Bloggers
Bite Me.
9) Butt Itches
Really... when are you supposed to take care of a butt itch? I vote for in public, for no reason other than to remove the stigma. And the itch.
10) Airplane 2: The Sequel
I can tell the same joke twice, and make it worse the second time too.
11) Airplane 2: The Sequel
It wasn't as gooder the second time.
12) People Who Are Famous Just For Being Famous
I'm looking at YOU George Harrison...
13) When a list of "Taboo" things just becomes a list of things that annoy me.
I HATE THAT SO MUCH I WISH THAT I COULD STOP IT IN MID-SENTE...
Muchas Gracias.
BradK
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What really grinds my gears... is when people raise their voices in conversation just to make sure that the other person can't chime in or knows that you are still the one with the imaginary talking stick. IRRITATING. Even worse is when you find yourself doing it because it's the only way that you can get a word in edgewise with these people. And I don't usually talk about it because it's so many people that do it. GRRR...
ReplyDeleteAnd on that cell phone 2-year contract - There is a lot of hate in my heart for those companies. One of them I beat the crap out of my phone in order to mail it back to them in pieces, but then decided that the shipping costs wasn't worth it. hate...
HOWEVER, I don't believe that this one is one that really qualifies for this list as that is something that people talk about. Or at least i do... because of the hate. But I don't think it's taboo.
So there.
7) Really I don't hate Microsoft or Apple for not pointing out their faults, I just hate them for not fixing them. The real people I hate ar the loyalists as you call them, or fanbois as the internet world seems to refer to them.
ReplyDeleteYou're loyal to a COMPANY whose primary goal is to provide you a GOOD OR SERVICE in exchange for your MONEY. Companies don't care that much about you. Playstation versus Xbox versus Wii versus PC is the same thing (although Wii fans tend to be less hardcore - however there are some rabid Nintendo fans).
Blind loyalty is stupid. I don't criticize you for choosing rye bread when I choose wheat. They both do the same thing, however you don't get blogs full of people flaming each other over which bread is better. My mac gets me on the internet, allows me to do word processing, IM and do various other things fairly similarly to if I owned a Windows computer. Does that mean either of us are better? I think it just means that when I did my research, I determined Apple was the better solution for me at the time of purchase. Someone else making a similar purchase might determine that Windows is the better solution for them. I defend myself when people insinuate because of my choice of hardware/software I am somehow a less knowledgeable computer user because of said choice.
I like Apple and I like its OS for what I do 95% of the time. Yes there are several fairly large issues with OSX just like Windows. Overall, I have just been happier with my experience with Mac for the 1 1/2 years I've owned one compared with my 10 previous years owning and running windows for the things I use a computer for. If I had enough money, I would own one of each anyway.
#4 was in Schmeatre. You owe Jerry R. $2.50
ReplyDeleteJerry might have written it. I made it funny. He owes me $10.
ReplyDelete